Hope for Life

Blogging

I had slowed down in my blogging mainly because there are more convenient network sharing devices nowadays. Like facebook. Plus I doubt anyone is reading my blog now.

But now, I want to write a blog again because I am going into a new phase of life.

I have decided to go for a transplant.

My CLL is back and this time with a vegence. The counts are increasing very fast, my lymph nodes are large and sometimes painful. I fall sick very easily and do not get well that quickly either. As compared to my state in 2008, this was quite bad. In 2008 before my treatment, I did not fall sick prior to my treatment at all. Even if I got flu, I recovered within 3 days. Now, I will have cough for 1.5 months. It is really torturing.

I think there is no turning back now. I need a cure. And the only cure known to me now is a transplant from my brother's stem cell.

However, this is a relatively dangerous because by transplanting someone else's stem cells into your body, it triggers a graft vs host disease, which in layman terms, means the 2 immune system will fight each other since they view each other as foreign and potentially killing your own body because of this.

I very much reckon this process as a resurrection sequence in a Phoenix life. In which, when the Phoenix comes to the end of its life span, it builds itself a nest of twigs that then ignites; both nest and bird burn fiercely and are reduced to ashes, from which a new, young Phoenix arises.

A new life can arise, but the Phoenix has to go through the burning, the "test", the ordeal, before a new life can be form.

I will go through this with the peserverence of the Phoenix. and hope for the day of reborn. After all, Phoenix is known as the 不死鸟, and I know, I can live through this test.

posted by Fay @ 9:35 PM