Hope for Life

Samantha, Cancer and Relationship

For people who have watched Sex and the City, and had follow faithfully through the seasons will know that Samantha got breast cancer in SATC season 6 and her boyfriend, Smith went through it with her with the utmost support.

And for those who watched SATC the movie will also remember that Samantha hesitated to end the relationship with Smith because he was there with her during her chemo days.

I think the movie shows a very realistic part of relationship to people who had went through cancer and chemo. Does it mean that if your partner went through the tough days with you, it means you have to repay them with your life?

Similarly, does it mean that if you have cancer, it is harder for you to find a partner?

I asked my friends about this question, if they would ever fall for someone with cancer and they answered idealistically, saying "yes, if the love is strong enough."

But you know, relationship dynamics changed the moment something like this happens. The relationship may either be strengthened or strained by this ordeal. And for single people, it may also mean a one-way ticket to singlehood forever.

It takes so much to go through such a period together as a couple. It takes a lot of patience and tolerance for the patient's partner to go through this. And like it or not, cancer IS going to change the one you love. The pressure, the physical pain and emotional stress, the long period needed for the treatment, the uncertainty, the discomfort, everything. It will change a person and it will change the person's perspective on many things; on life, on love, on family, on money, on friends, on the society etc.

It really is a very tough road for patients and partners alike. It is something not everyone would wanna commit to. And if they do, it is not something everyone can see through till the end.

Samantha chose Smith partly because he was there when she needed support during her chemo days. Cancer had CHANGED Samantha so much. Cancer made her tied herself down with a man, which is so totally unlike Samantha. And for a great 5 years!

Samantha only manage to let go of Smith after 5 years. Know the significance? Because cancer is supposed to be "cured" if one is able to stay in remission for 5 years or more. It is no wonder that she would wanna give Smith up for her old lifestyle after 5 years. Afterall, she is "cured". She needs herself back.


Smith and Samantha - The Great Distance.

But do you think she didn't love Smith? I don't think so. No one in their right mind would make sushi and placed them on her own naked body and wait in nude for their partner to come home, if not for that one big LOVE. But Samantha gave up. Because she really just want to love herself more. Because that is how she really is.

Cancer can really change a person. How well can the patient's partner accept the change? It really take a lot of love, faith and patience.

This road really is not easy.

But like Kanye West's "Stronger" lyrics goes, "Now that don't kill me, can only make me stronger."

Love will prevails for those with true love in their heart.

PS: This post doesn't really make much sense. I am just writing very random thoughts down so don't take it too seriously.

posted by Fay @ 6:40 AM