Hope for Life

Midnight Sun

midnight sun

Rating: PG
Language: Japanese with Chinese and English subtitles
Genre: Drama / Romance
Director: Norihiro Koizumi
Cast: Yui, Takashi Tsukamoto, Kuniko Asagi, Goro Kishitani

Kaoru Amane, 16 years old, did not attend school but instead sang herself away every night after dark at a square in front of a train station with a guitar in her hands. She led a lifestyle opposite the norm, sleeping during the day and active at night. Kaoru was suffering from xeroderma pigmentosum (XP), an illness, which also might be described as the allergy to the sun, and was not allowed to be exposed to sunlight. The only motivation in her life was singing, which also was the only connection to the outside world. One day, an incident drastically changes her life…

Kaoru returns home at 4:00 am, before sunrise. Outside her room window, she spots a high school student standing with a surf board in his hands. It becomes her routine to watch him and his friends come and go to the ocean every morning, before going to sleep.

Their destined encounter takes place during the few hours before the break of day, drawing together two individuals that would have never met in daylight. However, Koji does not know about her illness. The two rapidly fall for one another and continues to meet in the city at night. Then one day, an incident leads Koji to learn of Kaoru’s illness. Kaoru gives up her first love telling herself that, “I shouldn’t have allowed myself to dream of a happy life. I am not normal after all.” She even gives up singing. Koji seeing Kaoru at such a state encourages her by suggesting, “Let’s meet only at night,” and comes up with a brilliant present for her.

She had been leading a life carefully placing herself beyond the reach of harm, with no intent to pursue a dream. However, Koji had shone a light on her heart making her want to sing once again. However, her illness which has quietly progressed, has started to pressure her nerve system, keeping her from playing the guitar at her will…

After reading the sypnosis of this movie...I can't help but feel sad. "I shoudn't have allowed myself to dream of a happy life. I am not normal after all."

I know I am better off. But allow me to be melancholic tonight. Is dating someone really important? Is that what we are all seeking ultimately? The friend of the girl I used to date keep asking me if I am seeing someone new. It's as if that is the only thing lesbians can talk about. Then, I returned the question. Is Rach seeing someone else. The answer is yes. She is seeing someone. And gut feeling tells me it is someone I know. Gut feeling is right. Her girlfriend is a friend of mine. Friend that I knew for 3 years plus. What a small circle. Messy, and small.

Sometimes, I feel glad that me and rach never made it. I dunno what I can offer her. And in my state, I am sure she is not the kinda girl that can offer me anything.
Sometimes, I wonder is it destined that we are not together because of my condition. For I know that it will only spell disaster if we actually get together. She needs too much, something I doubt I can give.

I am over her. But I just feel a little upset about the whole situation. After all, I used to think she is the one. After reading the sypnosis of Midnight Sun, I feel even more upset. I felt like... Like I shouldn't allow myself to dream of that kinda dream. It is out of the plan.

Sorry, Just lemme continue to be melancholic for a while. I know I deserve the best. My best fren, Qin told me once, "Do not feel the lack of ability to choose and love. You got all the capability to do that."

I know.

But I can't help it.

My tears keep falling.

posted by Fay @ 8:42 AM